Tuesday Truth

Tuesdays and Treadmills, it’s a love hate thing.

Normally I love Tuesdays…it’s one day closer to hump day but this week has been an inward battle.  Between the weather, and knowing another week of training will be on the ‘mill, I had to dig deep.

I’ve learned a lot this winter in regards to relationships.  It’s hard to hang close to people you don’t spend time with a lot.  BUT, that doesn’t mean you care about them any less.  At least in my book.

In all honestly I miss my running friends.  They’ve all remained tough and have ran outside ALL winter long.  I, well, have not.  So it’s hard to relate as we are all over the place.  My sleep has been less than stellar as it is most winters (and when my husband travels) so I have taken advantage of any extra sleep I can get, even if it means missing run club.  Why?  Am I not hard core enough?  Am I not dedicated enough?

A lot probably would say such things about me, and my running/training this go-round has been less than hard core.  And I understand…while my friends are in sub-zero temps running miles outside, I am indoors with a tank top and shorts running in the comfort of my own home with indoor facilities and all the entertainment I need….right?

Oh HECK NO…I would much rather be outside, but the thought of my hands/feet going so numb it actually hurts (Reynaud’s syndrome-self diagnosed as my Mom has it) to the point I can’t take it keeps me inside in temps below about 35 degrees.  So sorry, but I just can’t be sorry.  I am simply exhausted and doing the best I can on my own.  I know…insert the #poorme reference here.  Sorry…

But here’s a good image that describes how I feel running on the treadmill…

pretty much...
pretty much…

I can’t find my groove, I can’t have that feeling of bliss.  Ack…I am saying I can’t.

But I’m running.  I am working hard.  And it’s the hardest mental test I’ve given myself in quite some time.

Brooks Launch 2's are officially MINE!
Brooks Launch 2’s are officially MINE!
5K done in my new kicks tonight!
5K done in my new kicks tonight!

Running a marathon was almost easier than running 6 miles on the ‘mill last weekend.  If I have to do 8 miles on the mill this coming weekend, I may need to be pre-medicated.  Just saying.

With that, I bid you all goodnight.  Another sleepless night has left me feeling less than stellar, and I am praying for some beauty sleep.  Sometimes I just can’t turn the ‘ole noggin’ off.

Pretty much! Pic from Pinterest
Pretty much!
Pic from Pinterest

I ask, how do you deal with winter training?  What do you do when you try to engage in conversation but things are always one-sided? Any tips on a full nights sleep?

Sweet dreams, y’all!

#keepmovinforward

Michelle

 

depression

A Mother’s love…

I am sure at reading the title of this post, you expect beautiful pictures of my daughters and poetic prose sweetly written about the joys of having daughters.

But nope.

This post, is about being a Mother to a 4 legged creature.  A dog more specifically.  MY dog.

I gave birth to my second daughter in 2006, on August 5th to be exact.  After which I was overcome with terrible post partum depression.  I thought it would pass, but after nearly a year the depression stuck and my husband stepped in.  I had encountered many “life issues” and had had enough…even running wasn’t going to get me through this patch.

Quickly, I welcomed this handsome 4 legged creature who would do more for me than any medication could touch.  THIS dog, helped me find my smile again.   I’ll remember the sunny January day we drove to pick him up, gosh, for the rest of my life.  My husband did research, and found a local breeder that had a male Golden Retriever.  We packed the kids in the car, Sophia just a year and a half old, and Jordyn 8 1/2 years old, and went to meet our new family member.

We had many names picked out, but Samuel Adams was the name he responded too, so there it was.  “Sammy” as he is known to our family was welcomed with open arms.  And then things changed.

I found my smile.  Because this wonderful little dog followed me EVERYWHERE.  He knew I needed HIM.  And he was there.  And he still is…

Now, 7 years later, as we celebrate his birthday I can’t help but to get teary.  Because this guy knows…he knows when I have a bad day, and he takes the time to nuzzle me a little more, snuggle a little longer, and give me more extra wet kisses than I care to have sometimes, LOL.

And I love him.  More than I can even put in to words.  Some people tease pet lovers dedication and passion, but I bet you a million bucks they don’t have this sort of relationship in their life.  Many a morning I will lay in bed after a night of insomnia, and Sammy will jump up into the bed, and snuggle in with me, pressing his forehead into mine.  He wraps his paws around me, and he knows…Momma is tired…Momma is stressed…Momma needs some extra snuggles.  HE…is there.  It still amazes me how they know…when you need them. This morning is a perfect example.  I didn’t sleep well at all, woke up far beyond the moment when my alarm would go off, and I closed my eyes, wishing for Sammy to come upstairs.  Seconds later, there he was, ready for his summons up in to the bed.  And for 5 minutes, in the dark, my pup loved me.  In his own way, told me, “It’s going to be ok.”

And for that moment.  All was right in the world.  I was loved.  And I knew, as a Mother of a 4 legged creature, I had done right with the world.  Even if, for just a moment.

So I will sleep well tonight, knowing I have loved just a little more, lived my life just a little better, because of my amazing dog, Sammy.  Thanks, buddy…for truly making my life so much better.

THIS
THIS
He loved his boots as a pup
He loved his boots as a pup
Daddy love
Daddy love
Jordyn and Sammy
Jordyn and Sammy
Me and my bubs
Me and my bubs
Sammy and Sophia
Sammy and Sophia

❤ Michelle