Deployment thoughts

Tuesday truths

I haven’t worked out very much in the last few weeks since getting the news of my husband’s deployment.  (FYI-I’ll be discussing a lot about what I am going through with my husband getting deployed – to include the next few months of preparation and the year long deployment. Please bear with me as this is a much needed outlet.)  Between lack of sunlight and lack of physical/mental strength I’ve just sort of been going through the motions of work, and home life.  I’ve managed a couple runs each week, and planking 4-5 times each week, but that’s about it.

I do however, cry. Kind of a lot. I sure try not to do it in front of my husband or kids, but sometimes I just can’t seem to wrap my brain around another year of worry for my husband’s safety.  This man is the rock I lean on, for everything.  And maybe I didn’t realize it truly until receiving this news, but it’s become very apparent that I need him as much as I want him in my life, and that maybe I am not as strong as I thought.  And with tomorrow being Veteran’s day and all the shows and commercials on T.V. I’ve found that lately it’s just all a bit too much.  So then I cry some more…Gah.  Stick a fork in me already! :/

I’m going to attempt to run on the treadmill this week and my friend Teri invited me to run with her this weekend.  I really need to let myself have ‘my things’ too, because in the last few weeks of doing everything for everyone else but me have left me very…tired.

Today my sister reminded me that it’s ok to feel this way, but to not waste the next few months I DO have with him being sad.  I suppose it’s just hard because even though he’s still “here” he really isn’t because he’s knees deep in preparation for the deployment, working longer days than I can even fathom. He truly is my hero.

This afternoon my husband texted me thanking me for all of the love and support and that he understood how hard this was on me.  And sometimes just hearing that helps lighten the load, even if just a little.

I truly appreciate everyone’s amazing support through all of this craziness.  It really has helped knowing I am not going to do this alone!!!!



Friday Five-Week 3 of training

Here are some things/stuffs I am loving/living this week.

1. First, and foremost.  My Brooks Launch 2’s.  I love them.  They are like clouds on my feet and I wish I could sleep in them…ok….maybe a bit much but still.

Brooks Launch 2's
Brooks Launch 2’s

2. I chew gum when I run.  Some question folks who can talk and chew gum at the same time.  I MUST run and chew gum at the same time or my cadence is completely OFF.  Brand?  Extra, of course. Orange or Watermelon are my go-to flavors.


3. As I near my 1 year anniversary at work, I find myself almost waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I am so in love with my job (minus weekends, holidays, and the occasional snarky person) that I keep shaking my head.  Every day is better.  Every day I feel like I am making a difference with the best crew I’ve ever supervised.  Someone.  Pinch.  ME.  now.


4. Single parenting is tough.  We’ve discussed this before. But sometimes we surprise ourselves and realize we CAN do it alone. Going on the better part of the month, alone and – WINNING.

I may have served 20 years, but I still have years to serve as a spouse.
I may have served 20 years, but I still have years to serve as a spouse.

5. Dreadmill runs are extremely difficult for me.  But as I ran tonight my virtual RBFF texted me continually telling me I COULD do this.  Thanks, Maria.

pretty much...
pretty much…

So at the end of the day, I am living, running, moving, and loving EVERY single step of my life.




Question-what made YOU happiest this week?

weekend wrap up

Weekend wrap up and stuff

Well my writing/running/cooking streak came to an abrupt end when I woke up Thursday with a terrible headache/migraine.  This also sidelined my run, and when this happens a dark cloud likes to hang over my head…such is Midwestern life in the winter, at least for this runner.

Knowing I wasn’t feeling myself, my hubby brought me THESE beauties to cheer me up.

Flowers for no reason?  Yes please...
Flowers for no reason? Yes please…

See, he is leaving (now has left) for the better part of the next 3 weeks which leaves me in charge of not only my job, but managing my kids, the house, the kids activities and my sanity.  No easy feat, let me tell ya…I’ve done it a million times before, but sadly it never gets easier.  Maybe because he really is my best friend, through and through, so being apart from him leaves me feeling low.  I don’t need someone in my life to make me happy, don’t get me wrong…but the select few humans I’ve chosen to keep near are a part of me-people I WANT in my life.  My people…so now that my #1 person is far away, well, let’s just say I saw him off at 4:30 a.m. and several tears were shed.

Also, every time I see him off, I am reminded back to a time when I saw him off to war.  This was a time when war meant you may never see your loved one again.  And every time he walks out the door, I have to swallow the lump in my throat.  My life just doesn’t work without him in it…Ok sorry, babbling over.  He is gone, and time to suck it up…lol

I woke up with yet another headache brought on from tears I am sure, so when I got a text from my virtual RBF Maria asking if I wanted to run, I almost said no.  But I didn’t say no…I drank some water, washed my face, and changed clothes to run on the ‘Mill.  I only ran 2 miles, but it definitely helped turn my morning around.

2.2 miles and my #Plankchallenge to start my day!
2.2 miles and my #Plankchallenge to start my day!

Lastly, I took my mini-persons to see the movie “Into the Woods” today, and we enjoyed it.  A bit drawn out, but I am guessing live this show is amazing.

Aren't we cute?  LOL
Aren’t we cute? LOL

With that, I’ve prepared snacks and helped the kids prepare for the week.  Ballet outfits are washed, school papers signed, and Valentines filled out for my mini-me who has a party this week.  The trash cans are even taken to the curb.  Go me, LOL!

My goal is short term this week, as I pray to just make it through Sunday because I also am working all weekend.  The hubs will be home Saturday afternoon, but turns around and leaves again shortly there after.  Weekend duty is always my nemesis, so wish me luck!


Questions!  How was your weekend?  Does your spouse travel for work/military?  What was the last movie you saw?

Have a great week, y’all!

❤ Michelle