Deployment thoughts · Uncategorized

Thinking Thursday

Since the news of my husband’s deployment I’ve gotten so many wonderful emails, cards, and even gifts sent to me by loved ones.
book
A daily devotional from one of my FB friends ❤
Out pouring of prayers, texts and phone calls have been welcomed with open arms on most days.  Because in all honesty even though I do get a daily text of “Love you” usually from my hubby, I have only gotten to talk to him a couple times as in “real conversation” talk in the last few weeks, and that makes my evenings very hard.  To say I am just hanging on by a thread or two pretty much sums it up.
Work stress is at an all time high, and of course parenting 2 girls one of which is a teen means my plate is over flowing.
Some days, I am ok.  Others…well, not so much.
Last night we had some window repair guys come to the door.  I begrudgingly opened the door to have them come in and give their shpeal about how my windows were old (duh, the house is 30 years old) and needed repair.  Would my husband be home later so we could discuss?  No, D-bag…My husband is deployed and I am the head of the household from here on out for the next year.  OOOOOOH.  Thank him for his service they said as they looked at my Grandpa’s shadow box on the mantle.
mantle
My Dad built this shadow box for my Grandpa, and it was given to me after my Grandfather’s passing.
How many tours has your husband done?   Two I said. I smiled and said thank you, and told them that I too, was retired military.  How many tours?  I didn’t go overseas…No comment from either gentleman.
myflag
Just a few of my accolades from over the years
They went on about the windows, and I could feel the fire burning in the back of my throat.  So often my service is disregarded, even by myself-but I’m allowed ha- because I didn’t “fight any wars.”  Not that they saw at least.  And that will always make me sad, because I joined the military in my junior year of high school on the delayed enlistment program TO GO TO WAR and fight for my country.  Yet here I am, almost 25 years later still working in a hospital job that was chosen for me by the military.
Miffed, I shook the man’s hands and bid them good night.
Several minutes later, my youngest tugged on my shirt as I cooked dinner to show me the card she and her daycare buddies made for my husband. As I pulled it out of the envelope and opened up the card I choked back sobs in seeing dozens and dozens of children’s signatures wishing my husband the  best on his deployment.
card
allthefeelsrighthere
And at that moment I realized that serving my country also meant sucking up all my stupid pride and serving proudly as an Army wife.
I may have not had the career I fought hard to attain, but God puts us where we are meant to be.  I have to have faith that this is where I am needed, at least for now. Every ounce of support I’ve received is just another thread in the rope I’ll be hanging on to this next year.  Thank you!!
Michelle
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25 thoughts on “Thinking Thursday

  1. Your service is valued and treasured, especially because you were also one of the women who changed the course of history in this country.

    When you first entered the military You fought many battles for equality, hell to just be able to serve and do your job on a daily basis was tough enough due to the prevailing attitudes of the “boy’s club” during that era. You broke through many stereotypes and other “crap” that you endured. Those of us who know many of the things you put up with will not forget how much you earned and deserved your military retirement.

    You are not the only military retiree (male or female) who did not see combat, there are many of us tweeners and you should be very proud of your service to your Country.

    H

  2. Michelle, I know all the BS&T you put in for 20 years. I only did 7 and I never went to “war” either, but you bet your bippy that we both worked our booties off during 9/11 and any other engagement to keep operations moving back home. I was just telling my friend today how proud (and a little envious) I am of my girlfriends who are now retiring having a full 20-yr career balancing military demands and a family. It’s such a great example for our future women entering the work force. Because if they want to do it, they CAN! Your girls are so lucky to have such an amazing mom who can show them that even through the hardest of times, Mom’s can still do really amazing things! ♡♡♡ U!

  3. Wow. Though I don’t live in the US, I greatly respect all of those in the Military. You and your families sacrifice a lot.
    Also, that card…oh my I have tears in my eyes. You’ve got lots of people thinking about you, even those outside the USA.

  4. I didn’t know you were in the military too, sounds like it’s a family tradition. I bet you’ve got such a patriotic family! Even those who don’t go off to war, still serve, that man still should have thanked you! After my dad returned from Vietnam, he spent 30 years working in the National Guard that one weekend a month and 2 weeks a year, training others, that is service and you all deserve just as much respect as anyone in the Military! On top of it you’ve been a wife to a husband with 2 deployments, that is a HUGE sacrifice in itself!
    I do love your grandfathers medals on the fireplace, so special you keep that!!!!

  5. That makes me sad that people don’t seem to put as much value to your service, since you were not stationed overseas. You’re still doing something amazing, and for your country. Respect that, people.

    (And this makes me think of how people should truly respect ALL jobs. I know someone in health who talks down everyone because their work is not as life critical as hers. It isn’t, but we all mostly offer what we can, right?! Same thing with SAHMs or SAHDs! Just respect people! Geesh!!!)

    1. Thanks, Kim. I completely agree. ALL jobs have importance and meaning, and no one is any more important than someone else. The surgeon performing heart surgery NEEDS to ensure that the housekeepers empty the trash so the room is sterile. BOTH jobs, equally important. One may take more years of education, but we all play our little parts in society.

  6. Hey even if those boorish window dudes didn’t appreciate your service to our country, just know you have a whole host of other “smarter” people who DO appreciate your service, along with your husband’s and anyone else who has ever served for this great U.S. of A. ❤ ❤ ❤

  7. Although it’s not been said Michelle…we do appreciate your service – even though you didn’t ‘go to war’ – you did give of yourself for us…and so unselfishly – you are a blessing!
    And isn’t “Jesus Calling” wonderful! – I read it daily 🙂 🙂 Hugs & Kisses!!

  8. Your service is very much valued. I get the same thing when people hear I was in the military…”oh where did you deploy?” Well, I never did. I served in a hospital stateside for 7 years. It’s amazing the disappointment that is heard from the other side. Like it doesn’t count because you weren’t deployed. I totally get it!

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