I’ve been a little MIA….I don’t like to write, unless it’s something positive, but…
I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately – ever since my birthday, really. While some say how wonderful aging is, how they’ve embraced their grey hair, deep wrinkles, weight gain, and sagging skin, me…well, not so much. (Thankfully I DO love the person I’ve become on the inside, so there’s that!!!!!)
I am at a place in my life now where I can say more likely than not, that my life is more than half over. On average, a healthy American lives until around the age of 77…that means I have (if I am lucky), 30 years to go…and that’s if I am lucky. Why on earth am I looking SOOO far ahead in the future? GAH, slap me now. No please, really….slap me!
Because it really isn’t that far off…and there is so much I still want to see and do in my life. But I am at the point where I wonder, WILL there be time? IS it getting to be too late? Hard to say…really. Time sure really does fly.
Everyone says, “Take that trip” or “Eat that cake” but man, I dunno…at the age of 47 I am still paying for my graduate degree, and now paying for my oldest while she’s taking classes up north. We are doing our best to pay cash for her classes/books so she won’t be in the same boat we are. Thankfully my husband paid his loans off a few years ago, but I’ve still got 2 more years to go. SOOOOO close, LOL.
And if I look at a piece of cake, I gain 5 lbs., so that’s a hard NO.
I do try to make the very best of my time here on earth, though. To make up for the lack of traveling or home improvements, we do our best to take as many trips to the Beach and Disney as we can and make as many memories as possible. I have become more aware of how short life is, having lost my dog last year and a near death experience with my Dad last year. So I’ve decided to make more of an effort to be present and show those that I care about, how much I love them. That could be a phone call, a text, a simple FB message…but I do it, and as often as possible.
I know, I know…such a morbid post. But it’s been festering inside of me for almost 3 weeks, and I have hope that by throwing it out there to the universe, that it will help me let go of the dread of aging so much. I suppose I am just not where I’d hoped I’d be at this stage in my life…but I know I’ll get there, eventually. I am just blessed that I have what I have, and I need to remind myself of that every day. I’ve got a great family, a couple of close friends, my health (knock on wood), a career, and we live in our dream place of sunny Florida. I am surrounded by blessings, and need to remember it!!! 🙂
So it’s out there, and now I am going to move past it and take my own advice and “Keep Movin’ Forward.”
SOOOOO…goals for this year to help get out of my funk are:
- Sign up for a few races
- Be consistent with my workouts – 2-4 times per week
- Be present
- Pick one thing each day I am thankful for and write it down
- Try to stop stressing over weight and wrinkles (that’s a tough one-LOL)
How do you get yourself out of a funk? Do you ever get on your own nerves, LOL? Tell me something good!!!