In the last 17 weeks and 2 days of this deployment I’ve learned a lot. A lot about myself, my kids, my family, my friends, my coworkers, and people just in general. Some of the things I’ve learned I will hold on to dearly. Like the fact that despite REALLLLLLY wanting to crawl in to a hole for the next year, I have MADE myself get out and do things. Fun things with my girls. Even a few outings with friends have made the time apart from my hubby a little more bearable. I’ve also chosen to keep my kid’s happiness my number one priority, because they deserve the very best in life. And in that choice, means a lot less “ME” time which can take it’s toll on me from time to time.
That choice has also brought some pretty judgy comments. “You aren’t running anymore? WHY? Just have your oldest daughter watch your youngest.” Stop. Right. There. I didn’t have kids to make them take care of themselves or each other 24-7, more importantly it’s not my 16 year old daughter’s job to watch her sister while I am out running. Sure, she watches her during the days this summer minus Wednesdays when I have her nanny come to give both the girls a break. But would it really be fair of me to have her watch her sister at night so I can go run after work when she’s been watching her all day? I sure don’t think so. I let her go socialize with her friends in the evening, attend her voice lesson on Wednesday and just be a KID. She’s already growing up too fast! There’s also the “If it was important to you, you’d make the time to run.” Really? Really…Hmm…Sorry, my kids are still more important. Take that Judgy McJudgerson. #rantoversheesh #Istillhavemybasementworkouts
I’ve also learned that being a victim or a martyr just isn’t the life path I choose to take anymore. And that’s huge in a time when I could easily fall in to the “poor me” trap. People will continually bitch and moan about how they’ve been handed a raw deal, or that no one is every there for them in life. But said people often forget to look in the mirror and ask WHAT they are doing to change their situation, or recognize how LITTLE they do for others. Quit. Blaming. Everyone. Else. Be real people. Please. It really is the only way to be. Pick yourself up, brush off the yuck and MOVE FORWARD. I promise, you’ll be happier for it. I was in denial for years and thought it was the world against ME. I was one of those people! When really, it was ME and against ME. What a life changing moment it was to come to that realization. Whew! #sogladimoverthatpartofmylife **This rant is about no one in particular, just a reminder of a road I hope to never travel again.
To keep up with keeping myself grounded, (and sane, who I am kidding) I have started cooking more, which is something I truly love so that is a good thing! Here’s Tuesday night’s bacon wrapped turkey roast, with Brussels sprouts and baked sweet potato fries! Since my hubby left we’ve been eating a lot of take out, sandwiches, frozen pizzas and soups. When my daughter said “Mom, it was so nice when I came home and smelled your amazing cooking” I was reminded of my love for cooking and the joy it brings to others lives. #allthefeels
Lastly, (at least for this post) I’ve learned that dogs truly feel the absence of ‘their people’ and it really hurts them. My dog Sammy has really aged over these last few months. He mopes around the house, eats random items, and is starting to have hip issues. We’ve got hard wood floors on our main floor and he slips and slides terribly. I think this weekend it’s time I invest in some rugs. My bud just hasn’t been the same since my hubby left, and it’s hard to see him so sad.
What life lessons have you learned lately? How do you deal with aging pets? Ever find yourself feeling like you need to explain yourself when it’s your life, and no one should be judging you?!
That’s all for now my friends!