moving forward

It’s been a while…

Well, I didn’t meet my goal of blogging at least 2 times each week as of last week, having only posted once last week and not posting since…But sometimes life just gets too hectic for all of the fun things that we enjoy doing.  And sometimes, we just need to step back and let things happen as they should.  For the saying IS true…everything WILL fall in to place eventually.

I had a pretty amazing opportunity come my way.  I will leave that part of this post fairly vague, but to say it’s an opportunity of life time is pretty accurate.  But…I can’t take the opportunity, as I am needed here by my husband and kids. Part of being a military wife, is giving up your own wants and needs so your husband can serve the country. And while I know my husband and kids (and my country) are so much more important than any sort of career chance I may be afforded, I still am left feeling very sad, and ever so slightly resentful.  Gah.

I hate that feeling.  I hate the dreaded sadness that can sit in the pit of your stomach and just burn, reminding you of it’s presence constantly throughout the day like bad heartburn after you’ve eaten spicy Mexican food, far too late at night. I hate crying every time I am left alone with my thoughts.  I hate the reminder of the depressed person I once was and the memory of crying every single day. Double GAH!

So last night I reminded my husband that I only had a few days left before this opportunity would be a thing of the past.  I had to decide.  They didn’t REALLLLLLY need me, did they?  They all spend their evenings on computer games or in their rooms.  They wouldn’t even notice I was gone, would they? #whoamikidding

deal-with-it-y

He shook his head.  “You can’t go,” he said sadly. “We need you,” he said quietly.  And he’s right…and I knew that all along.  But hearing him say it, made me feel needed and loved.  More so than I have felt, in quite a long time.

So while I am sad, I know my family comes first, and that someday there will be ANOTHER opportunity, perhaps at the RIGHT time…until that time, I’ll hug my family, count my blessing, and keep…movin’…FORWARD.  I’ve started running/walking again this week after a 2 week break, which has helped me digest this whole situation immensely.

Have you ever had to pass on a good opportunity?  Did it take you a while to digest it all?

Thanks y’all!!!!

❤ Michelle

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36 thoughts on “It’s been a while…

  1. Awww sorry Michelle! Life is full of difficult decisions, unfortunately, but the fact that you were even offered the opportunity should make you proud and bring you joy and can only mean more will come your way! I’m glad you felt better after talking to your hubby.

    Spicy Mexican food too late at night…LOL!

  2. Missed opportunities like that can hurt but you really are doing the most important job you could ever do. And I figure that when the time is right something else will turn up.

  3. I haven’t had an opportunity like that yet in life, but just trust that HE knows what path you should take. Always remember that the door closes, another one opens. And what’s behind it may be better for your family and YOU!! ❤️

  4. In the future, I think you’ll look back and see how all of this fit into place. Don’t be sad. You did the right thing and I’m positive there will be other great opportunities that come your way! Those runs will help you sort it out too.

  5. I’ve been there Michelle…sacrificing what I want for my husband and raising my four boys..I have cried many tears myself but have no regrets. I just keep remembering that for me it’s God’s will – not me. He knows where I’m supposed to be even if I don’t…so I wish you all the best with your choice! xoxox 🙂

  6. I hear you. Only here’s the thing. I passed up a fantastic career opportunity. Or I should say, what I thought was an opportunity of a lifetime. It wasn’t. In passing it up, I experienced so much more fulfillment- both in my career and in life. It will come. When the the time is right. Xo

  7. A few years ago, I was contacted by a recruiter about an NP position in Madison, Wisconsin, for an early intervention clinic. The patients would be 0-5. OMG. It was a dream come true. But when we talked with the boys, they did not want to move. I was sad. I would have given anything to move there. Sometimes you have to sacrifice the dream for the family. It was hard. Hugs.

  8. Family is more important than a career opportunity. I don’t know how old your kids are, but you will not regret spending the time with them and your husband. There will be more career advancement, but your family needs you now.

  9. Aww, sorry you had to pass on the opportunity. This just means that an even better one will come in the future. I’m currently trying to decide if opportunity is really knocking on my door or if I am running away with a hurt ego.

  10. Aww, Michelle, I can absolutely relate and i am sorry you have to feel so crushed even though in your heart you know your family loves you and needs you. It’s happened to me, too and I have to have faith that those same opportunities will still show up for me at the perfect time. Keep believing the right dream will show up at the right time for you! I’m sure your family appreciates you more than you know! You’re a pretty special person. Xo

  11. I have tears in my eyes. Both because you have to give up on this opportunity, but also because your family needs you. So many people have neither of those. You are rich.

    But I know it still hurts. Big hugs.

    1. thank you so much…I had tears in my eyes most of last week, and writing this post. So much so I almost didn’t share it. But I always believe in keeping things real, and it made it more real for me to put it out there. Thanks again! ❤

  12. So sorry you had to let this one pass you by. I admire your commitment to your family, and know that things will work out for you the way they should WHEN they should 🙂

  13. I truly hate that you have had to pass on your own opportunity for the sake of your family. I might do the same thing if I were put in that situation but there should come a point in time when women shouldn’t have to give up their personal pursuits for the sake of their husband/children/country. It should be okay to say I want this. And then go get it. I’m not dissing out on your situation. I’m trying to say I admire you made a choice. I know you will stick with it and find a way to be happy with it no matter how much it hurts right now. That is a lot of strength my friend. I admire you for it. Yes God will find you better bigger opportunities and you will get to do what you truly want. I have the faith.

  14. I’m so sorry that you had to pass on this opportunity but I truly believe that there will be an even greater one for you in the future when you are able to take it!!! Stay strong! Your kids & husband are so lucky to have someone like you ❤

  15. Aww, Michelle, that is so awful. I don’t have children, but my wife is a born and raised California girl who never wants to leave, which definitely limits my career opportunities. While I do believe that God puts us in the right place at the right time, I also believe that opportunity knocks but once. God gives us eyes and a brain to see and recognize the right opportunity when it occurs. In your shoes, I think I’d go. It’s too easy for others to say “we need you.” As the Bible says, the needy will always be among us. And who knows what good you might do should you accept this opportunity? As for myself, I know that when the right opportunity comes along, I will go whatever the cost. As a believer, I am reminded of the many times in the Bible when people were required to act on blind faith by leaving everything behind in order to travel to parts unknown to do the will of the Lord. Your husband and kids will be okay. No need to sacrifice yourself on the altar of family. If you do, you will look back on a life of shoulda, woulda, couldas.

    1. I made the choice to have kids, therefore they must come first because I am responsible for their well-being. I may look back with regret, but someone has to take care of them and my husband is always gone….:(

    1. Actually, if you take this opportunity, your daughters will be impressed by your determination and will. You will be setting a good example to them, as you do with your running, of what it means to never give up.

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